It's a yearly tradition: every fall his mom buys Webster new pants, every spring he turns them all into shorts. This year is no different. Webster takes a seat, having opted today for a pair of navy blue corduroy jorts (corts?). Next to him on the ground sits a graveyard of pant bottoms. The knees-to-ankle fabric. The bits that were lost in the sacrifice of making his many pairs of shorts. Come on by, strike up conversation, enjoy the nice weather, and help yourself to some excess cloth. Who doesn't want some free calf warmers?