Senior Jorts Day

[graysanatomyforkids]

SENIOR JORTS DAY

Happy Flag Day everyone. On this day in 1777, the United States adopted its flag by resolution of the Second Continental Congress. On this day in 2014, a bunch of seventeen and eighteen-year-olds wore cutoff jean shorts to class at their magic haunted camping school, because some sugar-crusted idiot made them do it and a new idiot has stepped up to turn a weird one-off thing into what the kids might call "a tradition" this year.

There's some sort of arbitrary-sounding contest going on, as well. Jortswearers can approach King Asshole Danny Notoriano to received Jorts Judgment and compete for the handsome prizes: a Barbie leg nailed to a block of wood, spray painted gold, and a bottle full of vodka gummy bears. This year, at the obnoxious behest of the Head Girl, there's an additional sockdals competition. That is, if you're willing to brave wearing socks and sandals together, the best combination wins a six pack of novelty socks.

Join in the festivities, because, like, I'm pretty sure you're all going to die in a week and a half, anyway, replaced by near perfect replicas of yourselves. Somehow both better and worse than the originals. So, live a little. While you still can.

HOW THIS WORKS

• Wear jorts.


• Mandatory fun.


• If you do not have jorts, bring jeans to Danny. He can help. He knows how to do severing charms.


• Teachers ask that jorts not reach more than three inches above your fingertips. Mind dress code violations!! Or don't. Because you're graduating in like a week. And, anyway, life is but a walking shadow, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, etc. etc.


• Danny will absolute not assist in procuring leggings or biker shorts for the bashful. Fuck you guys. THAT SAID Nia will. You aren't getting out of this.


• This is like ... just ... completely ridiculous. And for all those with a burning desire to take home a spray painted barbie leg, I'll be rolling until Friday 4PM EST / 2PM MST.


• Feel free to argue with Danny about your score.


• If thou seekest judgment, fill out this here form and post it to the Jorts Judgment heading.

<b>Name(s):</b> New phone who dis <b>What're You Rocking:</b> Anything special in the jorts department? <b>Sockdals?:</b> Are you a bad enough dude to wear socks and sandals? And are they cool socks? <b>Why Do You Deserve to Win:</b> 140 Characters or less, TWEET @ DANNY WHY UR JORTS ARE BEST JORTS.

» JORTS JUDGMENT: Get your jorts judged.

» DO A SCENE IN JORTS: Thread here if you like really want to.

» OOC - Shitposting!

Comments

JORTS JUDGMENT

[graysanatomyforkids]

get judged for wearing jorts. get judged for not wearing them. a strange game, the only winning move is not to play.

Re: JORTS JUDGMENT

[wholegrain]

Name(s): Girl George
What're You Rocking: A skirt, actually, and it's not even short.
Sockdals?: Socks just go so well with birkenstocks?
Why Do You Deserve to Win: Creative rebellion.

JORTS JUDGMENT: Georgie

[graysanatomyforkids]

"You just." Danny complains, gesturing vaguely at Georgie. You can tell he's exasperated because his hand gestures look like he's somewhere between shrugging and directing air traffic. "You were just...going to wear that anyway."

Oh well. He hands her an index card that says: Score: 1774.

JORTS JUDGMENT: Riley

[riledup]

Name(s): Riley Mae
What're You Rocking: Really more of a belt.
Sockdals?: Ew???? No????? No way?????
Why Do You Deserve to Win: Because she's a perfect girl who only deserves good things in this life.

JORTS JUDGMENT: Riley

[graysanatomyforkids]

"How much do you spend on sequins in a month?" Danny asks. Even he is unsure if it's a rhetorical question.

He hands over a card that says Score: 1471.

Re: JORTS JUDGMENT

[addytives]

Name(s): Addy!!!
What're You Rocking: Sherbet jorts; they’re too cute to lose points over
Sockdals?: She’s wearing bright neon knee socks and wedge sandals. She’ll trip and die and everyone will be too blind to retrieve her body
Why Do You Deserve to Win: Fun fact: Actually Addy was born in jorts

JORTS JUDGMENT: Danny

[graysanatomyforkids]

"Now I want ice cream." Danny whines as he hands over an index card that says:Score: 2801.

Re: JORTS JUDGMENT

[cecaelian]

Name(s): Ursula
What're You Rocking: Not jorts. Not even a denim skirt. Ursula's last minute burst of end-of-high-school spirit does not extend to jorts.
Sockdals?: ... But Ferdie is a strong proponent of Sockdals Day and she has Big Time feelings for him and all the absurd things he's agreed to do for her this year, so. Yes. She did.
Why Do You Deserve to Win: Pens irritated letter to Zav about this new "tradition".

Re: JORTS JUDGMENT

[foxpaws]

Name(s): Eileen Coffin
What're You Rocking: Monstrosities she will aggressively claim are inverse jorts. She's got some jean print bike shorts underneath for the, uh, very open back (not that the front is much better).
Sockdals?: God no, she's too cool for that.
Why Do You Deserve to Win: Inverse jorts are clearly superior. They're the future.

Re: JORTS JUDGMENT

[lilipad]

Name(s): Lilika Ignacz
What're You Rocking: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/21603273196924923/ (I’m just posting the fucking link because apparently my phone doesn’t recognize “ marks)
Sockdals?: Danny .... ew.
Why Do You Deserve to Win: @danny I cried when I let you cut these, SOOO... 😭

Re: JORTS JUDGMENT

[ferdie]

Name(s):Ferdie
What're You Rocking: Just dad jorts, they're boring, and long, but he's doin' it
Sockdals?: He's been gunning for this all year, it's great. They're fishies
Why Do You Deserve to Win: He doesn't

NON-JORTS JUDGMENT

[browbeats]

Name(s): Rosemary Goddamn Stoker
What're You Rocking: She's wearing the uniform skirt with leggings underneath. They're not even jeggings, they're just black leggings.
Sockdals?: Not even for Ferdie.
Why Do You Deserve to Win: "Why the hell would anyone let you judge them," she says from across the room, because she can't let anyone think she's even on speaking terms with this asshole.

DO A SCENE IN JORTS

[graysanatomyforkids]

It adds flavor

Let Riley Cut Your Clothes (OPEN)

[riledup]

It was a mistake to teach Riley severing charms, but it already happened, and she's much cuter than Danny. And some people might say she has a modicum of style. Those people are wrong, but they say it anyways. Plopped onto a couch in the atrium, trying to decide if the food smells drifting in from the cafeteria are worth getting off her ass for, Riley is available for shorts consultations.

So, if you dare, come let Riley Mae cut up your pants and call them jorts. Or, if your jorts are lacking in the pizazz department, let her get at you with a bedazzler. She's very giving today.

Webster and Pant Bottoms and Open

[websterknox]

It's a yearly tradition: every fall his mom buys Webster new pants, every spring he turns them all into shorts. This year is no different. Webster takes a seat, having opted today for a pair of navy blue corduroy jorts (corts?). Next to him on the ground sits a graveyard of pant bottoms. The knees-to-ankle fabric. The bits that were lost in the sacrifice of making his many pairs of shorts. Come on by, strike up conversation, enjoy the nice weather, and help yourself to some excess cloth. Who doesn't want some free calf warmers?

OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[graysanatomyforkids]

shitposting in the senior jorts day ic/ooc is inception

Re: OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[foxpaws]

Thank you for providing us with more jorts 😘😘😘

Re: OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[browbeats]

last year I did a very important scene in Robin's arc on senior jorts day so do it you cowards, scene in jorts

Re: OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[odder]

Good god JORTS gave me a stupid emotion

Re: OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[graysanatomyforkids]

P.S. Last year's winner was Iris Shacklebolt who may or may not have even gone here

Re: OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[casperkim]

Casper isn’t wearing jorts but he is sending Asher an owl to tell him his roommate is an idiot.

(I’m sorry about him.)

Re: OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[threatens]

smh if i ever make another senior they're going to be the type who'd willingly participate in senior jorts day

but love this, and you

Re: OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[riledup]

I can't believe polyvore is dead when I'd been saving terrible jorts for Riley all fucking year

Re: OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[lilipad]

Wow. Lilika is gay now. Eileen is her girlfriend

Re: OOC - SHITPOSTING!

[websterknox]

Oh my god. Webster's app actually says that every year he turns his pants into jorts. He's VERY MUCH here for this event.