gooseberryhigh | (no subject)

I think she's more at risk of an ulcer than a heart attack.

Wanna make a bet?

And end up with a gambling addiction, forced to sell drawings to keep my knees from being broken? I can't draw, Chris, this isn't an option for me.

Between you and me, I feel like that kid was lying anyway

I don't know man, I think you've just been spending too much time with conspiracy theorists.

Hey man. Some conspiracies aren't wrong.

JET FUEL DONT BURN HOT ENOUGH TO MELT STEEL BEAMS

I... don't actually know enough about jet fuel and the melting point of steel beams to refute that.

This is not an invitation for anyone to teach me about jet fuel and the melting point of steel beams.

Are you sure it's not an invitation? What if I gave it to you in a Binder and color coded it?

Don't tease me with binders. Binders are for serious business.

You're right. That was cruel. But I can make it up to you.

You can try.

Come skip the winter formal and get high with me

Just forget your fucking stands for two seconds and be free with me

Go to the winter formal with me.

~~Since when do you do dances anywa~~

[...]

Okay. That might do the trick.

The trick's not done yet. Wait till you see me in a suit.

~~It'll be a surprise for both of us. I've never worn a~~

On a scale of 1 to James Bond, how do you think you're gonna look in this suit?

I mean, I can't choose James Bond, nobody's james bond, we all want it, but nobody achieves it. But just visualize how great I look in this school uniform, and envision how great I'd actually look in fancy shit. It's okay if the imaginary visual is a little overwhelming. I have that effect.

I don't know dude, I've seen some of the most eligible young douchebags in California in suits.

Yeah but you also know I'm not a douchebag, which automatically makes me hotter. Plus I have the added bonus of never dressing up, which automatically makes me hotter because it's like a fucking rare bird type of shit.

I'm trying to understand how the scoring works in this game and I'm lost. How many points can I get for rocking crazy uncomfortable heels without a single grimace?

Oh no, you get all the points for rocking heels. You can rock a suit, I am physically incapable of rocking heels, so you win the points for that.

I'm not sure, but I'd be willing to bet it will hurt more than every fall or sled flip did. Even more than the gaping gash, I'd imagine. I would be surprised if they didn't have a way of getting your dad's address, though I'd also be surprised if mom wouldn't have some clause in your school attendance that includes "not contacting the useless pile of dick that got me pregnant"

Who? Penny?

I should've said something. Like thrown myself on the sword and asked them not to send a letter home to your dad or something. Ty was freaking out about his parents getting a letter and I didn't think about your dad.

But mines taking a renewed interest in my schooling, I think is what he said back in August. I think he feels owed or something. But I dunno. Mom doesn't really discuss it with me. It still wouldn't be as bad as your knowing.

And yeah. Penny. She's being weird.

It's fine. I can take it. I'm used to it by now. I just don't want them to mess with you guys by sending a letter to your asshole dad. He was useful as a tutor but now he can fuck off.

Don't worry about it. I didn't think about Diego having a concussion or how Zoey could sprain a wrist or how you could break a leg either. So I ~~deserve it~~'ll take my punishment.

Penny being nice isn't weird. I've always told you she's not as bad as you think.

You shouldn't have to take it.

And I thought about Diego having a concussion. I told him it was a bad idea and then got drunk with him. So I'm not really sure which one of us is the bigger asshole. But we're fine. I've healed a broken leg before magic. It could've been fucking worse.

I think you're lying about penny.

But maybe you should just tell your dad you're staying here for Christmas. And then just come stay with me. Or you can come to Rob's for a week or two with me.

Maybe not, but what else is there?

I don't know. At least you fucking thought about it. But you're right, it could've been worse. I had to participate in a "talk" that involved the whole cabin led by Cecil where that was mentioned. I feel like a monster now.

Why would I lie to you about anything? If something is going on with Penny, I don't know what it is. She's just been a little out of sorts since the Amortentia is all I know.

Wouldn't that make me a coward? I'm tempted And wouldn't Robin mind or wonder or something? It could raise conspiracy flags for him.

Just give me ten minutes alone with your father and I can solve it.

And Cecil is good with the disappointment face. Rafael just gets dickishier which is way easier to handle than disappointment.

I gave her a black eye. And now she's calling me endearing. It's fucking suspicious. I don't like it.

And it's not cowardly. It's self preservation. Like dude I'm literally going to Rob's because I don't want to spend the entire break moping about Levi. And I still fucking invited him over to take Mufasa for break. And to meet mom and shit. All I got planned for Rob is playing drunk quodpot or whatever it's called and attempting to kill ourselves. You want in on that?

It's a weird feeling when you can't decide whether that would be a good or bad thing for your own father.

Right? I'd rather take Ramirez and his lack of tact over that crushing disappointment any day. I'm questioning my whole being after that talk.

When did you give her a black eye? Why did you give her a black eye?

Oh my god. Please tell me he's coming when I can be there to witness him and mom. I've never been real good at self-preservation when it comes to him, but I see your point. That time at the conspiracy camp sounds like a dream really. But I don't want to be like pathetically tagging along and cramping your style. So. Be sure.

I've gotten good at hitting things with a bat. I just need ten minutes.

So would I. Now if he could stop fucking playing favorites with Wes, that'd be cool too. But Cecil knows what his friends are like. He's dating Levi. If he had a problem with people doing stupid shit, he would've picked a safer boyfriend.

During hockey. I elbowed penny in the face. Accidentally.

Levi told me he has plans doing shit for the first couple days. I figured I'd spend the first week at home anyway. Or else mom would kill me. Probably wants to kill me more after this shit. But she'd prolly feel safer if you come with me anyway. Look I'll just ask Rob if that's fine. Unless you wanna spend the whole break with mom, which is fine too. You know she likes having you there.

Well need a solid alibi before this goes down.

Right? Or in general. Though I'm sure Cecil gets accused of playing favorites too. Even though he doesn't.

Accidentally or "accidentally"?

I don't mind hanging with mom but if you tell her why, or even if I just do it she'll figure out why, then we'll have her going over to my dad's. And giving me extra sad looks when she thinks I'm not looking. Not that I don't need those looks but I hate making her sad. So yeah. Ask Robin.

Dude we're magic. All we gotta do is be in one place - full of people - a hour or so away, then apparate to the scene of the crime, kill you father, then apparate back. So the cops'll be like what the fuck they were an hour away, there's no time they could have made it here and back in ten minutes. Bam. Alibi.

Yeah, but even I know Cecil doesn't play favorites. I think I make him feel bad for dating Levi. He's even fucking partial to my emotions. Which - I remind you - I don't have. You'd think Ramirez could catch onto those nonexistent emotions too, and figure out that it pisses me off when he interrupts an argument and automatically takes Wes's side, like Wes's is a fucking bag of buttcracks back at me.

"Accidentally". But it's hockey, and she signed up for it. And we kicked her team's ass. So y'know, I was kinda expecting some animosity, some gloating, since I broke my fucking leg and she didn't. Instead she's over there calling me endearing, and calling it 'that's such a christopher park thing to do'. And I said it's not fucking endearing and she said 'If you say so!' instead of escalating it. I don't understand what's going on here.

But yeah, I'll ask Rob. I think mom gets that she doesn't need two teenage boys moping around the house all christmas break.

Yes.

I want you to kiss me.
[...] I need practice.

oh

Okay. I got you

Is that weird?

Nah. We all probably start there. I mean what is the grotto if it's not really just a really long game of kissing practice.

Oh is that what those parties are for? Lol.

But really, I kinda had my first kiss stolen from me and I want it back. I'm calling do-over. And I know you won't read into my stupid request for practice.

Lol and to get drunk

Nah I get it. I mean it's kinda an awkward request. Because we're taught that kissing is taboo unless you got some kind of relationship or sexual tension or something. But I don't buy into that shit. You get the right to have a do over

I haven't been drunk either. Tipsy sure, but not drunk.

Yeah I just you know, there's so much built up around it for me and I feel like you get that and if I'm going to have an awkward first kiss I want it to be with someone I trust.

I'm trying really hard to resist the temptation to be a terrible influence on you

But I get it. And that's fine. All first kisses are awkward, and uncomfortable. But we all been there. I accidentally headbutted the first girl I tried to kiss. There was blood. It was traumatizing.

We've got a club. It's called MALK. Make Avery Less (of a) Killjoy. You can be a member.

Oh my God that's hilarious and awful and I will remember that and know my first kiss was better than yours?

Sweet. You can join the Chris Park fanclub, because apparently that exists too.

Oh it was fucking terrifying. There was so much blood. I almost suffocated her trying to stop the bleeding. She fucking fainted. Like trust - your kiss, however the fuck it actually happened was smooth as fuck. But don't go telling anybody that story. I got a reputation here of being smooth as fuck because I got better fast.

Awwww.

I sense mockery in that single word

That is a talent of mine.

I feel like we're keeping her alive with all the creative ways we have getting in trouble.

Though I didn't actually sled this time. Way too cold for me.

Chris/An

I suppose you're feeling more sober now?

How's the leg?

That's what the alcohol was there for. To give us artificial warmth

[An]

Yeah, I guess I'm more sober. Leg's practically healed. I just had to stay overnight

I got the blessing of being there for the massive speech during lunch, though. Those never get old.

True. It did work, kind of. But anything below 70 is freezing to me, so this is basically torture.

If pretty torture.

Chris/An

Good, I'm glad. Hate to think of you missing more hockey.

Ahh yes, the I'm So Disappointed And You Could Have Been Killed talk? Those are always fun. ~~Gotten way too many of those in my life~~

Anything below seventy. How do you live. We've had summers below seventy in boston.

[Chris/An]

Thank god for magic, or I would've been fucked. Out the whole shinny season. rip.

Those are fantastic, definitely my favorite part of fucking up. But I'm in coppertale, so I don't have to deal with living with a very disappointed prefect that looks like a kicked puppy when he's disappointed. And I'm a senior, so I already knew to brace myself for the inevitable lecture and detention and loss of sauna privileges - oh wait, I already didn't have that privilege so sucks to be those prefects.

My mom's just gonna force me to watch her deal with patients who broke their legs so badly the bone is poking through the skin or some shit to teach me a life lesson on why breaking my leg is a bad idea. Which is actually worse than the lectures.

That was kinda an exaggeration. But mostly I freeze a lot though because I miss the islands.

An/Chris

And that would be awful. What would you talk about in between huh? I'd miss all the discussion of plays.

True. Rav isn't so bad, and Sun-mi is my friend, so it's never that bad. They just get very Stern and shake their head, but no puppy look, for sure. Sounds like it. Well, seems to me like the broken leg was probably punishment enough.

That sounds...disgusting, damn. I think I'd take the sad puppy lecture.

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