gooseberryhigh | (no subject)

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What's the weather like in North America this summer?
Is it still nice with a chance of mild haunting, or has it gone all stormy?

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I can report that it is humid enough to drown a fish in Atlanta today but there are no storms and I have not seen a verified ghost in at least four days.

Can fish drown? That would be interesting, as a fish, always at risk of betrayal by your own habitat.

A perilous life, but I think we all can relate.

Never get complacent, because what doesn't let you breathe will kill you.

Also I wonder if Canadian fish drown.

Even the air is your enemy. Vigilance is a virtue.

I don't generally condone animal cruelty, so maybe you can ask them instead of running an active experiment.

[...] Are you in Canada? And not Japan?

That's how I'm tracking down a Vancouverian salmon to discuss this with, yes.

Cool. I'm going to need a full report on the trail of havoc and despair you left in your wake on the way back to this fine continent. And maybe we can evengo over it in person.

We'll have to. I'm not saying there was a body count necessarily, but, you know. Accidents happen.

Eh, we can wait on those numbers. That's what the feds are for.

They won't find anything

brooklyn is currently sticky with a chance of toddlers.

the toddlers have all been returned to their parents alive. but, i mean, who knows. our groups are still in flux. i might get a ghost-toddler in my troop tomorrow? fingers crossed!

Sticky weather seems like it would draw out children looking for eternal candy, you could be lucky yet.

Why are you leading troops of toddlers?

maybe i'll make the kids make some ghost traps for arts & crafts tomorrow.

summer camp. they put me with the little ones cause all the first day crying made everyone else nervous.

You know? Never in my many years of Aesthetics have they taught us how to make something as useful as a ghost trap. Be sure to use a lot of glitter. That will at least stick to the ghosts so you could see them coming.

Whip them into shape. Erase their tears.

Edited 2017-07-12 20:56 (UTC)

i mean, it ain't on the official day program. but whatever. creativity never hurt nobody. and if i'm gonna get covered in glitter, i want it to be worth it.

the quickest way to get little kids to stop crying is to just START crying. then they just crowd around you in a teeny little circle and pat you on the head a lot. it's like magic.

Wear it bravely.

Deceiving infants into sympathy? Hm. That's smart, actually.

the midgets won't be able to lose track of me.

and then my niece threatens to pop people in the nose for being mean to me. which - i probably shouldn't encourage? but she's adorable as shit when she's being a public menace.