Goodbye "forever".

[evercreep]

Who: Calvin Evercreech & Micah St. Clair
When: Sunday, June 25th, afternoon.
What: Micah and Calvin say goodbye.
Warnings: Casablanca.

Micah's standing by the bus loading area, muttering to himself. Not the strangest activity for Micah—he can often be found talking through the scenes in his latest screenplay, getting the rhythm just right, refining the dramatic beats to hit with maximum impact. He's remarkably unselfconscious about looking weird when it comes to his pursuit of cinematic excellence.

But this time he shuts up the second he realizes someone's come close enough to overhear. Because this isn't a screenplay. It's him running through the most memorable lines from that thing, last night in the mines. The thing that looked like him and talked like him and even made exaggerated hand gestures like him, except he said things Micah only thought and never voiced.

He never asked, Do I really sound like that? Because he already knew he did. He knows those ugly, judgmental thoughts better than he'd ever want to admit.

He's got to stop obsessing. But not thinking about that means he has to think about other things that happened during that whole forestnapping debacle, and that's just... No. Fuck that. Micah opens the camera bag slung over his shoulder—the only thing he thought to grab before getting directed to the Atrium—and raises his camera to his eye, searching for a new distraction.

A familiar subject steps into Micah's frame. Calvin's solemn as he tries to get Micah's attention. In the spirit of keeping families together, Calvin will not be on Micah's bus. So this might be it.

Maybe it's for the best. Calvin can't imagine enduring over an hour sitting next to Micah, chatting casually as though this wasn't goodbye. The alternative is spending that time agonising under the weight of their parting. Frankly, Calvin doesn't trust either of them to express that much unguarded emotion.

"Immortalisin' the moment?" he asks, still dulled, but he's trying. Calvin has several different images of Micah in his head now: Micah, nervous and scared in that other world, just like the rest of them. Micah, radiant and confident in his dream world, handing him a leather jacket. And finally, something wearing Micah's face, tearing Calvin to shreds. "Sorry to interrupt. I only wanted to... uhm."

"I need something to put in this chapter of my documentary. Plus, when am I ever going to get such good costume details on Aurors?" But Micah lowers his camera, so he can look at Calvin with his own eyes. He looks tired. Most of them look tired, but Micah still remembers how determined Calvin had been. They'd been in the mine for hours, but Calvin still picked up that shovel and got to digging.

He didn't lose that purposeful pride until Micah's face aimed a derisive look at him, and Micah's voice gleefully announced to all how much Calvin missed being a bully who treated everyone badly. How much easier it had been. Safer. More rewarding. You'll be glad to go back to it, won't you, Calvin? You won't even hesitate that long.

Micah exhales slowly. "Can I take a picture of you?"

Calvin looks away, dodging eye contact. He's not ready for a portrait, but in all fairness, he never is, and probably never will be. There hasn't been a single photograph taken of Calvin where he's gone into it thinking it would turn out well. Yesterday he would have refused. You have countless photos of me, St. Clair. I've seen them. I look the same today as I did last week. Now he's not so certain that's true. He doesn't feel the same, in any case.

It helps that today of all days, Calvin's not certain there's a lot he'd refuse his friends.

"Why? That is, if you really want to." Calvin takes off his glasses. It's as good of a concession as Micah's going to get. "I look like a mess, though."

Micah shakes his head. "You look heroic," he informs Calvin, with a smile that's too slight to be insincere.

Before Calvin can change his mind, Micah raises his camera again, and measuring Calvin in the frame. He has the sudden image of Calvin with his hair slicked back and wearing a leather jacket, confident and easy in a way Calvin almost never is. It's startlingly different from the boy who walked miles through a cave and picked up a shovel. Calvin's hair is anything but neat. It's a good look. Micah makes sure the early morning shadows are perfectly flattering before he snaps one picture, and then another, for luck.

"As for the why... I'm holding this as blackmail. Now you have come back." Micah grins, brighter this time. "Unless you want me to remember you like that forever."

Miraculously Calvin still has enough energy to be exasperated. Micah never has to try that hard to get a rise out of him. Even when Calvin's exhausted and still thinking about the ancient expanse of the forest and its residents, Micah can distract him.

"Oh yes, fantastic, remember me as a bloody mess." You look heroic. No, Dimi looks heroic. Calvin exhales and stands up a little straighter, and pushes his shoulders back. "Don't know if that's what I want you to remember about me."

Micah snaps another picture before Calvin can turn his face away and ruin this. “The artist is taking requests,” he intones. “What’s the essence of Calvin Evercreech? What would you like to be immortalized forevermore? Maybe a smile? Are you going to smile for me?”

He brings the camera nearer, closing the space between them. Which is terrible for photography, unless he wants to immortalize the inside of Calvin’s nostrils, but great for just being annoying. Micah wiggles his camera up and down like an agreeing nod.

Calvin’s face in the lens of the camera scowls. It’s a common sight. Micah must have a million photos of this face: irritated, uncomfortable, nervous. Similarly, there must be plenty of images where Calvin’s hand shoots out and pulls the camera away. The deviations from this equation are ones that aren’t captured by the camera. Micah will have to rely on his memory alone for what happens next.

A hand grabs the back of Micah’s head, and Calvin presses a hard kiss to his cheekbone.

Micah clicks the shutter. The lens captures the view over Calvin’s shoulder, and the blur of Micah’s surprised jump. Mercifully, he doesn’t drop his camera.

People have surprised him with a kiss before, but usually Micah’s quicker with a sly witticism, or an over-the-top declaration of love. Coming from notoriously prickly Calvin “Don’t Touch Me” Evercreech, this feels somehow more final than anything else before. Not knowing what else to do, Micah bumps his camera against Calvin’s chest. “Calvin, please. Now everyone’s going to want a kiss.”

Calvin lets go of Micah almost immediately and hides his hands in his pockets. “Then you’d best get started,” he says, and then clears his throat. His voice is level in that forced way it sometimes gets when he’s struggling not to give something away. “I never said I was lookin’ for exclusive goodbye kissin’ rights.”

Micah smiles wryly. “Of course, never that.” A pause, in which Micah’s eyes drift to over Calvin’s shoulder again. “People are boarding the buses. Looks like that one’s for sophomores…” Or juniors, as they technically are. Or are they not juniors until September 1? Are they still sophomores when they’re technically not students anymore? Not that Calvin’s either one anymore. Hogwarts uses some weird numbered year system.

Micah takes a deep breath. So I guess this is goodbye. No. He can’t. “I’ll send you a copy.” He pats his camera with one hand.

Calvin takes a step away. “Right. I’m leavin’ on the same bus as Damon,” he says in a rush. The meaning is implied: I’m not going on the same bus as you. This is the last time you’ll see me. Micah must have already figured that out. Calvin takes another step back and starts to turn. If he stays any longer, what he’s hiding will keep threatening to surface. He can’t fight it forever. “Keep the photo. I know what I look like, and that way you won’t forget about me too soon.”

It’s not in Micah’s nature to be sentimental, but the dramatic part of him rebels against leaving this on such an unmemorable note. Luckily, he knows just the thing to make this parting iconic.

“We’ll always have anti-anti-prom!” he calls out to Calvin’s retreating back. “I’m no good at being noble, but it doesn’t take much to see—okay, okay, okay, that speech is way too long, what I mean is…” He shoots a wink at Calvin. “Here’s looking at you, kid!”

Calvin pauses and looks over his shoulder just as he steps onto the bus. He hangs out of the door and stares at Micah as an unreadable expression settles on his face. This is one Muggle film he’s actually seen before. Micah didn’t show it to him, and he hardly remembers it. The lines are all out of order, and time’s running out, but nothing ever works out perfectly anyhow.

"You mean always have Paris,” he calls back to Micah right before he disappears into the vehicle. Calvin can almost remember the tune of that old song playing in the back of his head.