(no subject)

[threatens]

This is why I don't like cookies.

[Coppertale Quidditch]

K, we've got just days before our match. It's the last game before the break, so we've gotta go all out for this one. I'm not spending the entire fuckin winter with anyone having doubts about Coppertale's chances at winning the Cup. So let's go over this shit:

1. Between me and Charlotte's scheduling, we've got practice every goddamn evening leading up to Sunday. All hands on fuckin deck, attendance is mandatory. We can talk about getting a break on Saturday if you aren't all flying like fuckin jackasses. Drink water, stretch before every practice, review your goddamn plays.


2. I'm still your goddamn captain. Yeah, I'm also still benched for this game, but it seems like enough of you were willing to speak in my favor so... Vector's not tossing me out. So if any of you drive this fuckin team into the fuckin ground during the next match, I still have the fuckin power to kill you. [...] And hey. Thanks.


3. Lewis and Lacey, how's Ashworth? I want some honest fuckin opinions. You're gonna be up against experienced Chasers and I don't need to see them flying circles around us just cause we fuck up early in the game. [...] Dixon, I want you with us too. Azurcrest's Beaters are good, they'll be looking to knock out one of ours.


4. Barringer and Meer, you've been doing extra Beater sessions, right? I wanna talk targets. You need to take out a fuckin Chaser this game. They'll be expecting it, it's practically Coppertale–Azurcrest tradition, but taking their Chasers down a peg is gonna be key with our current roster. Who'd be easier to aim for, Key or Castillo?


5. Velasquez and Wainwright, you're better than your counterparts in Azurcrest. Don't you fuckin get cocky about it, and I mean you, Reid. I want our Beaters to focus on getting Chaser blood, which is gonna leave you on your own for a bit. You OK with that?

[BAD KIDS WARD: Nisha & Dinah]

Head's up, Vector's got safety concerns about you two. I'm supposed to be like a fuckin role model and tell you to not be massive fuckups, but like, that's not my fuckin job. The only thing I'm responsible for is making sure you can both play Quidditch and I'm fuckin awesome at that.

[...] You two are being careful, right?

[Reece]

I need a fuckin word with you, Downing.

[Ro]

D'you ever wonder why we still care so goddamn much about Mom and Dad think of us?

[Clementine]

[...] Hey. You wanna help an enemy captain unwind?

I got a big fluffy cat, if you don't think I'm that cute.

Comments

Reece/Sy

[peanutbuttercup]

[...] What's up?

Reece/Sy

[threatens]

Vector didn't wanna name names but I figured out which fuckin snitch prefect reported my teammates to her. I mean, it wasn't that goddamn hard.

[...]

You really think there's a problem?

Reece/Sy

[peanutbuttercup]

I'm not sure it really counts as "snitching" if Well, so far this year, they've tried to pierce each other's ears with an old nail, almost drowned in the lake, sent howlers to the entire Ebonhide Quidditch team, and rafted down the Rainbow River on a mattress... so, yes. I think they have some behavioral problems.

[neattrick]

How many did you eat?

[Sy]
i do love your cat

what's up?

[threatens]

Dude. None. I don't like cookies.

[Clem]
And she loves y She's getting fuckin spoiled. I thought she'd be like a rodent-killing badass cat, y'know?

Nothing. The game this weekend. You know how it is.

[neattrick]

But they were free.

[Sy]
i saw her eat a bug once.

ah right. [...] i have the pitch booked tomorrow if you wanna throw quaffles at me.

Stokers

[browbeats]

[...] I guess it's just a hard habit to break.

Stokers

[threatens]

I've been trying for four fuckin years to not care what they think, Ro. I thought I had it fuckin down. I wasn't gonna jump through their goddamn hoops anymore.

But this Cotillion shit happens and it's like I'm back at square one. Like, what the shit. Why? We've known since we were like 11 that they were garbage fuckin parents. How much longer, dude?

Stokers

[browbeats]

Are you asking because you want to vent, or because you actually think I'll have the answer? Because whatever the answer is for you, it's at least twice as long for me.

Bad Kids & Bad Dad

[godzillabutworse]

UM I haven't died, YET?? [...] I guess this means I should BELAY my QUIDPRANK for the bird game though HUH??? :( :( :(

Bad Kids & Bad Dad

[dinahdanger]

What's your PRANK though???

Copperteam

[dinahdanger]

Just tell me what to hit or grab or blind boss!!!

[BAD KIDS]
Crazy careful.

Copperteam

[threatens]

We need to run you in a few different combos with Lewis, Lacey and Ashworth. Delgado and Hobbs are a good team. Not the most vicious, but they've been working together for over a year, they know what they're about.

How are you for extra practice this week?

Bad Kids & Bad Dad

[threatens]

K. And when's the last thing you did something dangerous?

Copperteam

[ashworthless]

He's doing fine, I hear [...]

Ashworth? Still kind of an asshole. But he'd practice more if you wanted.

Copperteam

[threatens]

Asshole's a prerequisite for this team. But good. That's what I wanna hear.

You feel ready?

Copperteam

[uponawire]

Well, Key's a bigger target. Kid's built like a tank. But I don't know if that necessarily makes him easier.

Copperteam

[threatens]

Shit, yeah, he looks like he could take a couple of hits. Morales-Tran is the obvious one, but she's green compared to the other two. It wouldn't be so bad to keep her in and go after a more experienced one.

What if you and Charlie focus your fire? Pick one, make sure he doesn't get off that field with all his bones intact.

Copperteam

[godzillabutworse]

Aroo's GOT IT, Cap!! I think like [...] he could stand to take a few more RISKS on the pitch?? But he knows our plays real good and he's a quick flier and he can take a bludger to the head ALMOST as well as my brother??? And I'm CONFIDENT we'll be a well oiled machine on game day even if we DIDN'T tie our legs together!!

We're all STRONG on point so like we could try idk idk doing something like a shallow cross to keep folks wondering what we're up to when on offense??

Copperteam

[threatens]

Right. We need to put him through his paces. [...] I have some exercises from Fiori we haven't really tried yet. We need to do some stuff to challenge you all more, get you outta your comfort zone.

Shallow cross. I like it. What do you think of me letting Ira decide who's on point at any given moment? Like you said, he knows our plays, and they won't be expecting it from the reserve.

Copperteam

[ashworthless]

Aroo?

Copperteam

[heathclifflacey]

Got it, Boss!!

And Ira's been working his ass off. He's SO READY. But extra practice can only make him MORE READY. And us too. So let's do it!

Whether it's Key or Castillo, do me a solid and take them out early so Pan can play?

Copperteam

[threatens]

Good. That's what I like about you guys. Endless fuckin energy.

And yeah, that's what I'm counting on. [...] Although Zabinsky plays Chaser too. And he's friends with the captain. Castillo might decide to put him if we take out a dude instead of a teeny girl.

[.....] Unless he's fuckin unconscious, I guess.

Copperteam

[cygninae]

I never need help.

[...] But yeah I'll be careful about bludgers or whatever.

[casperkim]

This is why?