gooseberryhigh | (no subject)

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okay, in what is probably the most tragic announcement i've ever had to make in my life: i have too many cookies. i can't keep them in my cabin. ~~legally.~~

anybody want some?

there are thin mints.

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you into dudes who've been mauled by tigers?

do you think you have to collect all of the merit badges before they let you OUT of girl scout prison?

Depends on the dude. But let's go with, yes, very much so.

I wouldn't be surprised. Girl scout prison must be an adorable Sisyphean hell.

nice. very nice. good information to have on hand.

what do girl scouts even DO other than cookies? i mean, i guess i'm pretty good at lanyards. might scrape a month off my sentence.

Don't go running into any zoos wearing a meat suit, now.

Better get good at making friendship bracelets. And hiking. I bet there's a lot of hiking.

pinkie-swear.

ugh, god. hiking. sorry, it seems that i'm going to be dying in girl scout jail. i'll write to you.

Maybe there's a badge for breaking out.

do i have to do it with a troop, or am i allowed to be an independent escape artist?

Probably two different badges. Solo escape and group break out. Not sure which is more prestigious.

whichever one gets me out of hiking.

You're gonna have to act fast to get out of that. Go with solo.

though i feel like i should take into consideration whether my escape route will involve climbing over things or crawling under something.

cause if i have to dig my way out, i'm going to need assistance.

Good point, but, honestly? If you're not using a spoon as a shovel, you're not really getting the authentic jailbreak experience. I'll sneak one in to you in a cake.

i probably won't see you again until we've graduated, what with all the digging, but i will treasure my escape spoon during every centimeter of freedom i gain.

I'll wait for you.

man, you really shouldn't wait on my escaped-convict ass. i won't even have a GED and i'll be on the run from the girl scouts of america.

But doesn't being on the lam from a well organized army of preteens while earning your high school diploma sound like a great action movie hook?

maybe if i have to win back your affections AND my dubious academic standing?

I can pretend that you'd need to win back my affections, but I won't be very good at it.

Edited (contractions >:() 2017-09-11 23:49 (UTC)

i feel like you'd be owed it after i spent two years in the slammer. i'd make some grand gestures.

Will they involve skeletons?

they could TOTALLY involve skeletons.

Why did I ever leave you to begin with?

the jail sentence, probably.

Huh. I should learn patience. You'll win me back pretty quickly with the skeletons thing, though.

you couldn't be certain if i'd ever make it out. i mean, the tunnel took a real long time.