(no subject)

[kazim]

Today's forecast is moderate with a 80% chance of showers. A warm front moving in from the south around lunchtime will turn that precipitation into a 50% chance of smacks to your behind.

Tune in to GBTV for more about weather, local sports, and supernatural happenings every day of the week at 6 o'clock p.m. Mountain Standard Time.

[Warded to Ebonhide Quidditch]

• When do "Quidditch drills" end and "unreasonable torments" begin?
• Is needing to dodge dunks and slip away from sinful shrubbery too taxing on the modern high school Quidditch player?
• When is "enough" really "enough"?

Has Captain Leonardo Fiori gone too far? Discuss.

Comments

[rosenkrans]

Did someone get you yet or are you a mere observer?

[kazim]

I'm watching from the wings like a curious ghost.

[rosenkrans]

That's practically begging someone to try and drench you.

[kazim]

But if I'm a ghost wouldn't I be undrenchable?

[rosenkrans]

Did you actually die recently and I missed it?

You need better friends.

[kazim]

Didn't you think it was weird when my birthday cake was shaped like a headstone? Or when the icing wrote out "Happy Deathday?"

[rosenkrans]

I thought we were just bonding over a shared interest in the afterlife!

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

smack his butt with a stick if you don't like it

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ninjaleo]

Only don't, please.
You can all handle this much.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

What if I have a crush on you

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ninjaleo]

I'm very sorry?

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ulixes]

Aw, c'mon, Leo. Feel the Dyngus.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

i saw him first

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ulixes]

He already rejected you. You gotta give the rest of us a shot.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

why are you so damp btw

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ulixes]

I gave up.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

mr hot stuff on campus, everyone has a crush on you

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ulixes]

Just 'cause you're undesirable doesn't mean you gotta act out, Tiny.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

I got drenched before it was even breakfast, I just know how to work my wand

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ulixes]

They know when you're dry.

That's when they come for you.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

i'm surprised your girlfriend even takes part in this plebeian tradition since she's of a similar socioeconomic status to you

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ulixes]

She's My girlf I'm continuously surprised you know how to read, and yet, you don't see me talking about it.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[destructobot]

There's that Southern gentleman coming through again.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ulixes]

Uh huh. Nothin but charm and good breeding, as I'm sure my whole cabin can verify.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[kazim]

Pardon?

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

i'm in love with leo, raz

Ebonhide Quidditch - DAMMIT HIS USERNAME COULD HAVE BEEN ~razamakaz

[kazim]

I thought that was a requirement for the team. You mean we had a choice?

Ebonhide Quidditch - I think she calls him "Razberry" sometimes

[neattrick]

it's not a dictatorship

Ebonhide Quidditch - oh no but that's adorable :(

[kazim]

... I need to talk to my lawyer.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ninjaleo]

Of course it's a dictatorship. Your lawyer isn't needed here.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[kazim]

I didn't think through this 100-year contract very well.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ninjaleo]

I hate joyful traditions involving water.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[kazim]

Were you baptized and is this self-loathing on the phone.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[ninjaleo]

I was, and I cried all the way through even then. It was a cold church.

Ebonhide Quidditch

[kazim]

But what if I give him the wrong idea?

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

he's spoken for so it's fine

Ebonhide Quidditch

[kazim]

I wanted to cause trouble in paradise...

Ebonhide Quidditch

[neattrick]

then you'd be giving him the RIGHT idea

Ebonhide Quidditch

[kazim]

Wait, which idea am I supposed to be giving him?