gooseberryhigh | (no subject)

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so it's shark week.

in my house, that means it's time to melt into the couch while my dad yells at various australians on our tv as they stab great whites with tiny tracking-device harpoons and almost get themselves eaten by things.

which is great! but tonight's 'sharks and the city: nyc' special wasn't at all about anthropomorphic sharks living undetected in our neighborhoods, going to PTA meetings by day and chewing on small children and house pets under the cover of darkness. it wasn't even about sarah jessica parker secretly being a mako. and i'm really fucking disappointed. i'm just saying. a lot of potential was wasted here.

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Naw, of course you aren't.

I'd help kickstart it.

course i am. you've listened to me.

i definitely got some work money i can throw in.

I've liked everything I've heard so far.

Just a few thousand more and we'll be taking this to Sundance.

oh ~~you can't just SAY tha~~ thanks.

step one: break into the factory that makes girl scout cookies.

[...] Welcome.

Step two: Exercise incredible self-restraint and don't eat all the thin mints after stealing them.

i mean, there's still a whole hoard of shit you ain't heard yet. but it's nice that you're optimistic.

step two: proooobably failed? (but hey, as long as we don't eat everything else, i feel like we can still net a decent profit margin.)

I'll keep listening and let you know, then.

Oh good. I wasn't sure I'd be able to commit to that, anyway. So, will we be standing outside a grocery store slinging cookies or are we going with a risky but organized black market scheme?

i expect periodic reports.

do we want to start small and establish ourselves as trustworthy first? or we just going to full throttle this illegal dealing thing?

They'll even be annotated with specific examples and my commentary.

Discretion is the better part of valor [...] or I guess valor isn't the right word here. Maybe grit? Anyway, starting small is the better option. West Side Story: Sharks VS Aliens doesn't need to be rushed.

i feel like i've made a mistake here. i don't know if i'm going to hold up under that level of scrutiny.

discretion is the better part of double-dealing? and it's true. we're gonna need time to perfect our casting choices anyway.

You'll be fine. Your auditor is a little biased in your favor.

Double-dealing. Definitely. Maybe that's why the sharks came back to the city. They were anticipating casting calls. Which implies that they also have supernatural foresight, I guess. Truly, they are strange and majestic creatures.

does the auditor take bribes?

it seems totally possible. the special before it was 'sharks and the city: la' - so they were covering both coasts. getting ready to chow on the competition.

He might. Gotta be good, though. What did you have in mind?

Just a bunch of elasmobranchii with stars in their eyes. Dream big, fish.

why, mr. kowalski - a lady don't kiss and tell.

i feel like i'd watch a reboot of 'the fast & the furious' series starring vin diesel as a thresher shark with very little shame.

Ah, well, I guess we'll have to wait and see, then.

Let's go ahead and reboot Pitch Black with sharks while we're at it. I think we might've stumbled on a niche goldmine.

i mean, very tenchically speaking? not a lady. but it's embarrassingly close on occasion.

we need to make some calls to some people. get some things set in motion. maybe speak to the rock. y'know, just in case.

Edited 2017-07-26 15:26 (UTC)

Nothing to be embarrassed about.

Everyone has been replaced with sharks except for The Rock. This is a great idea. You're a genius.

you haven't been over for pretty pretty princess night yet, dude.

i feel like we've really stumbled upon some brilliance here. we're really going places.

If this is an invitation, consider me RSVP'd.

Does this mean we're producers? How exciting.

we'll save a spot for you. i feel like you'll really pull off a tiara.

colleges are gonna be clamoring for all of this raw, resume-building material.

Might get lost in the hair, but I'll try it.

We are both going to be so employed in ten years.

no way. there's no way in high hell that the curls ever do anything that isn't improving situations exponentially.

yeah, but as what? is it possible that we've diversified TOO much?

~~That~~ ~~You~~ [...] Noted.

At least we can always fall back on organized crime? But I don't know how any potential employer wouldn't want someone who has their own production company and has fought ghosts.

good note.

we'd maybe need to not eat all of the product for that. cause, man, i was really thinking about how much i enjoy samoas. and it's a lot. like - do i really want to share those either? hm. point. though we'd maybe run into some trouble with no-maj employers and their ghost-validity beliefs.

I think we're still okay but we can't eat the tagalongs or the do-si-dos. Not much of a black market sale if all you're offering are trefoils.

Hmm. Unless we specifically go into producing ghost hunter television shows. That might at least give us some eccentric appeal.